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ESPN The Association: Chicago Bulls

March 21, 2011


Bro-love = boring = no ratings. (Photo Credit:

As I was watching ESPN The Association: Boston Celtics last night, I lamented to Jocelyn that there wasn’t a Chicago Bulls version. Personally, I’d love to be able to go behind-the-scenes and follow these players around to see what they’re like off-the-court. But Jocelyn doesn’t think it’ll happen because there just isn’t enough drama on the team and the overflow of bro-love doesn’t exactly make for riveting reality television. I had to agree to a point. The Bulls are just too…..nice.

But even so, I’d still love to see an ESPN The Association: Chicago Bulls series if not to see some of the following things:

  1. D. Rose’s mom calling him to tell him not to swear during games. It’d probably go something like this: “Derrick, stop swearing on television. People can read lips. God does not approve.” “Yes, mom.”
  2. D. Rose saying “I just wanna wee-un” at least twice each episode. [yes, wee-un. Not win, WEE-UN].
  3. A bunch of the players playing NBA 2K11 against each other and Boozer screaming some variation of ‘GIMME DAT!,’ ‘GET OUTTA HERE!,’ ‘AND 1, FUCKERS!’ or ‘[insert various obscenities here]!’ during the game.
  4. Jo No hanging out in his basement smoking a questionable leafy substance and hating on KG and the city of Cleveland.
  5. D. Rose talking smack about how much of a better cook he is than everyone else during team dinners: “C’mon y’all, didn’t you see me cookin’ in those 2k11 commercials? My food is so dope it’s CRAZY. Chef Pooh be straight cookin’!!”

So while this doesn’t sound like the most exciting team ever, I’m fine with that. I like boring. I’d much rather have what the Bulls are now as opposed to the drama that was the Jo No suspension, the Paxson-VDN incident and mediocre game records of the last few years.

The Bulls are one of the top teams in the Eastern Conference this season and seem to actually, you know, like one another. I’ll take that over ‘drama’ any day.


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